What Self-Leadership Means to Me
When we talk about self-leadership, it is really about leading ourselves before we can lead others. It is about truly understanding who we are, what drives us, and how we intentionally guide our actions to achieve meaningful goals. It is the ability to influence our own thinking, emotions, and behaviour toward positive outcomes. In simple terms, self-leadership means taking ownership of our direction by deciding what we do, why we do it, and how we do it.
In the world of academia, self-leadership plays a huge role. As lecturers, we juggle many responsibilities such as teaching, research, community service, and administrative tasks. Without self-leadership, it is easy to lose focus or motivation along the way. To me, self-leadership means staying grounded, reflective, and proactive in continuously improving myself as an academic and as a person.
Beginning My Journey in Academia
When I started my journey as a junior lecturer at UTM, I was full of excitement and ambition. I wanted to do everything well, from teaching and research to handling administrative work. Along the way, I learned that the academic path is not a straight line. It is a long and evolving process that requires patience, reflection, and continuous learning.
I still remember my very first day reporting for duty. Coincidentally, the Faculty was preparing for an AEC audit the next day. I had barely settled in when I was already involved in preparing documents and assisting with the audit process. It was something completely new to me, but it opened my eyes to the broader role of an academic. That experience made me realise that being a lecturer is not only about teaching in the classroom. The structure of a faculty and the programmes it offers also depend on strong organisation, collaboration, and leadership within the academic community.
Self-leadership became the anchor that kept me steady through moments like that. I learned to pause and reflect on my progress, to ask myself honest questions such as “What went well?”, “What needs improvement?”, and “Am I still moving in the right direction?” These reflections helped me grow, not just as a lecturer but also as a learner in my own journey.
My Strengths as a Junior Academic
Over time, I discovered personal strengths that help me navigate academic life. I am naturally reflective and like to look back at what I have done to find lessons in every experience. I also value continuous learning, which keeps me open to new ideas and improvements.
Time management is another area I try to prioritise, though it is still a work in progress. Setting clear goals and being consistent with them allows me to stay productive while maintaining balance. I also find motivation in collaboration because I enjoy exchanging ideas with colleagues, working on research teams, and contributing to projects that go beyond the classroom.
I am very grateful to have a strong support system at the Faculty of Civil Engineering (FKA UTM). My mentors and colleagues have been generous in sharing their experiences and advice, especially during my early days as a lecturer when everything felt new and unfamiliar. Being part of the Reliability Engineering and Safety Assessment Research Group (RESA) has also been a great help. The members are always willing to guide and support me whenever I seek advice or get stuck with something related to research. Having such a supportive environment makes me realise how important it is to surround ourselves with people who inspire growth, kindness, and collaboration.
These experiences and connections have shaped how I view self-leadership. It is not only about leading myself but also about being open to learning from others and contributing back to the academic community that supports me.
Recognizing My Challenges
Being a junior lecturer also comes with challenges. One area I continue to work on is managing my time effectively. Balancing multiple responsibilities such as teaching, supervision, administration, and research can sometimes be overwhelming.
I still remember my first semester of teaching. It was one of the most stressful yet valuable experiences in my academic journey. It was my first time handling two to three subjects back-to-back, and managing lesson preparation, assessments, and student engagement within such a packed schedule was truly challenging. There were days I felt exhausted and unsure whether I could keep up. But as the weeks went by, I began to enjoy the process and learned together with my students. That experience taught me the importance of time management, flexibility, and maintaining a positive mindset even when things get tough.
Another challenge is building my scholarly voice. In the beginning, I often doubted whether my ideas were good enough. But over time, I realized that confidence comes from experience. The only way to strengthen my academic voice is by using it more often through writing, presenting, and engaging in discussions.
Through self-leadership, I have learned to face these challenges with awareness rather than frustration. I practice self-regulation by knowing when to push forward and when to pause. I remind myself that small, consistent steps are still progress and that patience and perseverance matter just as much as ambition.
I also admit that finding balance between work and personal life can be difficult. Sometimes, I get caught up in work and forget to slow down. Self-leadership reminds me to take care of my well-being, to rest when needed, and to protect my energy. A healthy mind and body are the foundation of a sustainable academic life.
Practicing Self-Leadership Every Day
To keep improving, I practice several key principles of self-leadership: goal setting, self-reflection, self-regulation, and self-motivation.
At the start of each semester, I set clear goals for myself. These may include improving a specific aspect of my teaching, publishing a paper, or learning a new skill. I write them down and revisit them regularly. This helps me stay focused and accountable.
Self-reflection is another practice I value deeply. I keep notes about what works and what does not, especially after teaching sessions or project work. This small habit helps me identify patterns and continuously refine my approach.
Self-regulation, to me, is about staying calm and disciplined. There are moments when things get stressful, deadlines pile up, or research results do not meet expectations. I have learned to take a step back, breathe, and tackle one thing at a time.
And finally, self-motivation keeps me going. I remind myself why I chose this path. Teaching and research may be demanding, but the impact they create especially when I see students learning and growing makes everything worthwhile.
Looking Ahead: My Vision for the Next Ten Years
When I imagine myself ten years from now, I see a more confident and established scholar who continues to grow and contribute meaningfully to the field. I aspire to be an academic leader who not only publishes research but also inspires others through impactful teaching and mentoring.
I hope to take on leadership roles, collaborate with researchers around the world, and engage in projects that create real impact in society. My dream is to make UTM proud by contributing to research and innovation that solve real problems and improve lives.
To achieve this, I plan to stay committed to self-leadership principles. I will set yearly goals that align with my long-term vision, regularly reflect on my progress, and practice self-regulation to stay balanced. I will continue learning, connecting with others, and staying curious. Most importantly, I will nurture the motivation that started this journey, the desire to make a positive difference through education and knowledge.
If I manage to achieve the goals I have set for the next ten years, I do not want to stop there. I want to continue improving myself and keep setting new visions for the future. Growth does not end with reaching one milestone. It is a continuous process of learning, exploring, and challenging myself to achieve more and make a greater impact. For me, self-leadership means never settling, but always striving to become a better version of myself.
Final Reflection
Self-leadership, for me, is not a single skill but a lifelong practice. It is about staying aware of who I am, what I value, and how I respond to challenges. It reminds me that leadership starts from within by managing myself, I can influence others more effectively.
As a junior lecturer, I know my journey has just begun. There will be ups and downs, but I believe that every experience brings growth. By continuing to lead myself with reflection, discipline, and purpose, I can build a career that is not only successful but also meaningful.
In the end, self-leadership helps me become the kind of academic I aspire to be grounded, passionate, and ready to keep learning, teaching, and contributing to the world of higher education.