Jokes

I once gave my husband the 
silent treatment for an entire week, at the end of which he declared, “Hey, we’re getting along pretty great lately!”

Customer Service

“A smile is a curve that sets things straight.”

— Anon

Gratitude

“Money is the opposite of the weather. Nobody talks about it, but everybody does something about it.”

– Rebecca Johnson

Motivation

“Know what you own, and know why you own it.”

— Peter Lynch

Happiness

“In the long run, it’s not just how much money you make that will determine your future prosperity. It’s how much of that money you put to work by saving it and investing it.”

— Peter Lynch

Jokes

Why You Should Make Love Once A Year

A therapist has a theory that couples who make love once a day are the happiest. So he tests it at a seminar by asking those assembled, “How many people here make love once a day?” Half the people raise their hands, each of them grinning widely. “Once a week?” A third of 
the audience members raise their hands, their grins a bit less vibrant. “Once a month?” A few hands tepidly go up. Then he asks, “OK, how about once a year?”

One man in the back jumps up and down, jubilantly waving his hands. The therapist is shocked—this disproves his theory. “If you make love only once a year,” he asks, “why are you so happy?”

The man yells, “Today’s the day!”

Motivation

“Money is the best deodorant.”

– Elizabeth Taylor

Customer Service

“Stellar service should be non-negotiable and merchants shouldn’t hide behind self-service tools and technology when it comes to knowing their products and taking care of their customers.”

Lauren Freedman, President The E-tailing Group

Education

“When you make a mistake, there are only three things you should ever do about it: admit it, learn from it, and don’t repeat it.”

Bear Bryant, Former College Football Player and Coach

Happiness

“Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.”

– Jackie Mason