Somebody asked me this question few weeks ago. “What would you do if people criticize you or talk behind your back?” “Don’t you feel sad knowing how people backstabbing you?”
Well, there are hadith about how we should treat people. I am trying to learn the best way to treat others according to the sunnah. It is an arduous process. This is my personal struggle.
For now, my stance is even if I know someone is backbiting me or talking behind my back, I would do nothing. I like to use this analogy. Imagine backbiting and all are like a shit or poo (I am referring to the literal human feces). It is smelly and bad, right? If someone gives you that, would you accept it even if they shove it into your hand? Of course, you can either accept it or refuse to take it.
If you accept it, what would you do with it? Keep it? Or use it? Well, poo can be a good ingredient for compost. So, you can use it for better usage such as gardening. Or you can take it and keep it and later on complain about its smell yada yada yada without stopping.
If you refuse it, good for you. It is what you should do. When people give shit to you, don’t take it. You are not obligated to take it. You have a right to refuse it. It is your choice.
If the person throw it on your face, what should you do? Well, you can either throw it back to the person or you can clean yourself. If you throw it back to the person, well, in this case, you are alike. Tit-for-tat? It can be perceived that way. If you decide to move on and get yourself clean without making any noise, it is choice. After all, no shit or poo cannot be cleaned and cleansed.
My point is, make a decision for yourself. Do what is the best for you. So, to this person even though this is a late reply, I have done all of the above. I cannot decide anything for you, but one thing that I can do is to be there for you when you need me. In sha Allah I will always be there for you