Category: Personal

A memory with an iron lady

I met Rita in 2009.  We joined Kelana Convoy trip to Europe.   After that trip, she came to Durham in winter 2009 with her friend, Hayat.  We went to Newcastle and ate at Gekko.   The restaurant claims that they serve Halal food but they also serve non-halal food (they put the trays in different sections though).  

On our back to Durham, I remember of thinking about the plates and such that we use.  Opsie…. what if the plates that we used are the ones that were used by others who ate non-halal thingy like pork-based food?   This makes me realise that I have to be extra careful when it comes to eating at such restaurant which caters the halal and non-halal food.

Rita lost her mom not long after our trip.  Her trip to Durham was the trip before she went back to Malaysia for good.  She is a clever and hardworking individual.  Even though, she might appear playful, but she is very serious when it comes to serious things.  When she shared her woes with me, I told her that she needs to discuss and confide in with her mom.  She said that she didn’t want to make her mom to worry about her and her siblings so there were times when she would rather share about her problems with friends.  What a tenacious and caring girl!    She has already the characteristics of an iron lady at that time.  

I am glad that everything turns out alright for her after the incident that shocked the whole country in 2010.  Alhamdullillah justice has been well-served even though it took about seven years to find the closure.   The thing happened during Ramadan.  May Allah Bless her mom with Jannah.  

Band of sisters

When I did my Latihan Ikhtisas, these three ladies are the ones who help me the most.  From the left: Fiza (wearing the sport attire), Aalia, me and Ita.  All of them are really passionate teachers.   I never had any teacher as passionate as them but I am glad that the school has them as their teachers.  May Allah Bless them with continuous hidayah, barakah and rahmah.  

Salivary duct stone

The year was 2010.  It was February.  I felt really stressful at this moment to finalise my PhD thesis.  Due to that, I didn’t take care of myself really well.  What happened then?  

I started to have a bit of swelling on my right cheek.  I had that for a week or two.  I didn’t think too much about it.  Then, on one morning, I started to feel a painful throbbing.  When I looked myself in the mirror, my right cheek was swollen.   I started to feel something hard on the inside of my right cheek using my tongue.   I didn’t know what the thing is.  I brave myself to endure the late winter chill to go to school to edit some of my work.  

I googled the symptoms and I came across this term “Salivary Duct Stone”.  I know what causes it.  It was my fault of not drinking enough water.  I neglected my health.  It was not a time for me to panic.  So, I googled more information on how to get rid of the stone naturally.  Going to the doctor was the last thing on my mind.   I tried several ways to flush the stone out naturally.  I did it!  My salivary duct was a little bit infected because there was yellowish /reddish puss coming out with the stone.  The puss didn’t stop for a while.  Once it stopped, there was a hole inside my cheek and my cheek was still swelling and the throbbing still persisted.  This was when things became unbearable.  

So, I went to the nearby clinic.  The doctor gave me a referral letter and asked me to go to Sunderland Hospital which would take me around 1 hour journey from Durham.  I called K Ila and she sent me to the hospital.  I packed some clothes just in case I have to be warded even though that would be the last thing that I want.  Alhamdulillah, it was just a salivary duct stone.   I showed the doctor the stone and he told me the stone was out and he couldn’t see any stone left.  With that, he gave me a prescription to reduce the swelling and I didn’t need to be warded.  It took me an hour and half to reach home.   

This serves as a lesson for me: I need to drink enough water everyday to keep myself hydrated and avoid of having a stone inside my mouth.  Alhamdulillah, I don’t have any recurrent swelling until now.  

A creative friend of mine

I had a chance once to visit my friend who was studying at Nottingham back in 2010.  We went to Nottingham Castle and whatsnot.  We came across Robin Hood’s statue at the hill of Nottingham Castle.  If I were the photographer, I would not have any idea to give instruction to make this pose. 

But, my friend said “Dij, why don’t you make it this way?  Take a peek under Robin’s shirt”  and then while I was peeking under the shirt, she took this picture.  She is creative indeed.  Now, she holds important position in UTM who in charge of the branding and rebranding of UTM.  Zac, thanks for taking this picture and memorable moment when I was in Nottingham visiting you.  I will treasure it for the rest of my life In sha Allah

Once upon a time…..

It has been a while since I cooked lasagna.  But it was my staple food when I was in Durham.  I looked up at an old posting from FB.  I found this recipe.

P.S:  I never cook lasagna since I came back to Malaysia for good in 2011.  Yup, it has been nearly 10 years since the last time I cooked lasagna.

Lasagna…

I have tried it couples of time. This is the best, so far

Mince meat (depends on how many people to eat but for a tray like in the picture, I use 500-800gram of mince meat)

Lasagna sauce (I use Dolmio’s – the most cheap brand here, not sure how much it is cost in Malaysia)

White sauce (I use Dolmio’s too but I improvise it)

Mozzarella cheese (around 300gram)

Cheddar cheese (around 100gram)
*can be replaced with slice cheese – 4-5 slices

Black pepper, white pepper, Tabasco sauce, tomato sauce and salt (for seasoning)

Fresh Milk

Olive oil for frying onions (tumis sikit – I use half of indian onion)

Oregano (for the smell – just a dash or two)…

Lasagna (in a box usually)

————————————————————–
1) For the meat sauce.

Fry the chopped onions. Then mix it with meat (make sure it is half cooked so it is still tender. Add Lasagna sauce (put other ingredients for the seasoning as well according to your preference). Let it simmer well.

2) For the white sauce

You can just use it without improvising. For better result, improvise it.

Simmer a bottle of white sauce in a pan. Add milk (accordingly) and melt the cheddar cheese and 100gram of mozzarella cheese)… if it is thick, add more milk (a dash or two of black pepper/white pepper)…. Let it simmer.

Then for the layering

First layer, meat sauce. Then white sauce. Lasagna. Repeat the process. Make sure the top layer is lasagna and pour all the white sauce (make sure the lasagna is completely sunk – tenggelam tak nampak) and then just put all over on top of the white sauce and the mozzarella cheese…

Bake it in the oven for 30 minutes or so with 170 degrees

Let’s do this together

 

I am a bit slow when it comes to using technology thingy.  I admit that.  But, I am willing to learn and incorporate whatever the latest technology thingy in my teaching practice.  It has been more than few semesters that I used elearning quite extensively.  I learn how to get Band 5 (Blended learning).  It is all about strategising certain things.   It is a matter of getting used to use elearning.  I do admit that.  

Why the sudden change?

After I ended my LI (Latihan Ikhtisas), I set a new goal for my teaching/class.  I want to use new thing per semester. This semester, I have started to use Prezi.  I even subscribe it for a year.  But, it is not enough, I know.  

One of my colleagues encourages me to “be more active” in webometric.  Yup.  I “left” this webometric thingy more than 3 years and it takes a while to catch up.  But, my colleague said “Try to write one post per day, Dijah.  You can do it!”  She also taught me how to link webpage etc. in my post.  But, I am taking a baby step here.  Not a major leap.  I know my own ability and capability.  

She also said that there are other things that I need to catch up now.  There are ORCID, ResearchGate, and so many other things.  I was dumbfounded for a minute when she showed me how ORCID works.  Looking at my reaction, she gave a small laugh and said “Don’t worry.  You will get used to it.  I know that you can do it.  Don’t rush.  One thing at a time“.  

I felt like crying at that time but I mustered whatever courage that I have as I left her room with new determination.  I will try my best to learn and keep myself updated with whatever new thingy.  In sha Allah.  

Norah, thanks for the encouragement and support.  I learn a lot from you.  Let’s do this together.  

Burn out or depression? Which is which?

A recent message about burn out that was shared by a colleague makes me think about my friend.  What makes her to be depressed?  Is it triggered by burn out that she experience but go unnoticed?  Now, she has to take medication twice a day to regulate her state of well-being.  She has become medically dependent person.  I asked her, “How do you feel if you forget taking the medication once?”  She would say the effect would be immediate.  She won’t be able to fall asleep (stay awake more than 24 hours) and has difficulty to focus (due to sleep deprivation).  She said “I cannot ‘function’ and I will start to imagine things“.  That’s serious.  Since she was professionally diagnosed as having a depression, she was on medical leave for undisclosed period of time.  

But to tell the truth, it is not easy to distinguish between burn out and depression or to differentiate between burn out and stress unless we get someone who are clinically trained to do the diagnosis.  No one is immune of depression.  There are many cases of people who seem to have everything succumb to the bout of depression.  Some even inflict harm towards others or themselves. 

So, in this matter, one has to be vigilant and aware about one’s well-being.  Also, administrators too play important role to support and be emphatic to those who have started to show some “symptoms”.  Sometime, we overlook the physical symptoms that indicate underlying psychological problems that we might have.   

Of course, one can easily use depression, burn out and stress as an excuse of being less productive.  But, if we look at the person from different angle, does he/she display any symptom that indicate psychological problems that we should be aware of?  Is it fair to “punish” this person as being less productive and thus he/she is given low evaluation for the yearly appraisal even though he/she could not perform well due to undiagnosed psychological problems?  

It is an paradoxical phenomenon.  But perhaps in this rat race world, we need to be more emphatic towards each other, especially towards our own self.  Sometimes, we are more concerned about others and thus, we tend to overlook in taking care of ourselves. 

Scam? Oh please

I came a bit early today because I was planning to finish my marking.  Finally, the students have submitted their assignments and all so that I can start marking their papers etc.

Around 805am, the land line phone in my office rang.  I was a bit suspicious.  Who on earth will call me this early when I know that half of my colleagues are not even in the office yet.  I just let the phone rang unanswered.  Then, it stopped.  Well, at least it stopped ringing on my phone but there was a phone ringing nearby my office.  Yup.  My next door neighbour’s phone was ringing.  It rang for several minutes before it stopped (well, this neighbour of mine will not come to his office during exam period this early.  That’s his routine since the last few years). 

But then I faintly heard another sound of phone ringing.  It must be one of the few doors neighbour’s phone.  What a heck!  I thought it has stopped (few weeks ago, there was another colleague got this kind of call.  He answered but he was informed that he got some loan etc. and needs to settle certain amount of money to certain bank).  This is clearly a scam.  Beware guys!  This is an example of digital fraud.  There are many cases which might leave traumatic experience to some.  My stance: Stay calm.  Don’t panic.  Know your financial state.