The school conducted a programme (Program Ziarah Cakna) last Thursday (23 May 2019). I went to the school because I paired with Teacher Ita (one of the English teachers) to pay a visit to one of the selected students. I had a quick chat with some of the teachers to ask about what’s new and whatsnot since I left the school last March 2019. I asked specifically about some of the students that I taught before. I asked about their performance in the recent mid term examination. I was worried that I had not covered many of the topics for the first two months but the teachers told me that I covered the topics according to the weekly plan according to scheme of work (SOW) of the respective classes. What a relief!
Teacher Ita told me that Rahim is one of the students who frequently asked about me. It is a classic case of attachment. In this case, I do admit that as an adult, I might be his role model. This is an example of how important an adult can be for an adolescent because he/she is in a phase of role confusion (or laymen commonly use “identity confusion” or in Malay – kecelaruan identiti). Many studies in psychology have shown the importance of adults in helping adolescents in this transitioning phase between childhood and adulthood.
What should I do with Rahim or any other students who are showing this kind of attachment?
I never had any experience of dealing with school kids before because I teach university students since I start my teaching profession in 2005. Well, for obvious reasons they are not adolescents, they are young adults and they have undergone the adolescence phase. They are not in need of adult role models like me. Their needs are different in this case.
I am still racking my brain in this case because I do not want him or any of my students to have “unhealthy attachment” or “transference”. Transference is a term commonly used in counseling or clinical psychology which could happen during therapy sessions in which a person develops “certain feelings/emotions” toward the therapist. But in education setting, transference could also happen in which a student may have certain feelings/emotions towards a teacher. Well, it is not all bleak and gloomy but I don’t wish Rahim or any other male students especially to have “certain” feelings towards me, an old lady. There are cases of relationships between teacher and student who develop into romantic intimate relationships. Perhaps, I am a bit paranoid in this case but I guess there is nothing wrong to have extra precautions. Prevention is better than cure.