Personal | Hadijah binti Jaffri

Umur 40 tahun

PROGRAM KEROHANIAN FSSH 2022, SIRI 117: Bila Usia 40 Tahun ~ Surah Al Ahqaf, Ayat 15

Apabila seseorang berumur 40 tahun, sekiranya mempunyai tabiat, perangai dan tingkah laku sama ada ke arah kebaikan atau ke arah keburukan, tabiat, perangai dan tingkah lakunya itu menjadi lebih mencabar untuk berubah (Ibnu Kathir, terhadap terjemahan ayat Surah Al-Ahqaf: ayat 15).

Seeloknya, perlu menghafal dan mengamalkan bacaan doa yang dinyatakan dalam ayat 15 (Surah Al-Ahqaf). Ini adalah doa Nabi Daud AS.

Akan tetapi tidak semestinya perlu menunggu umur mencecah 40 tahun baru mengamalkan doa tersebut. Doa tersebut boleh dibaca oleh orang yang telah mencapai usia dewasa.

Ayat itu diturunkan disebabkan oleh bacaan doa Saidina Abu Bakar RA ketika beliau memasuki umur 40 tahun. Berkat doanya itu, seluruh ahlinya menjadi Muslim (ayahnya, anak-anaknya). Terdapat juga pandangan ayat ini diturun disebabkan oleh tiada peristiwa yang khusus.

Ayat ini mempunyai tiga intipati:

1) Berbuat baik kepada ibu bapa: Berbuat baik kepada ibu bapa sama ada masih hidup atau telah meninggal dunia.

2)Tentang umur 40 tahun: Ketika berumur 40 tahun, keadaan hidup bagi sebahagian orang mungkin telah mencapai tahap yang lebih baik. Contoh: Mungkin keadaan ekonomi dan status sosial makin baik. Tetapi, ianya menjadi cabaran dalam memastikan diri masih lagi fokus kepada berbuat baik kepada ibu bapa. Umur 40 tahun juga adalah batas kematangan dan keunggulan (ini merujuk kepada kehidupan Nabi Muhammad SAW yang menerima wahyu pada usia 40 tahun). Ada pendapat menyatakan bahawa bukan sahaja Nabi Muhammad SAW menerima kenabian pada usia 40 tahun tetapi ada juga nabi lain yang menerima kenabian pada usia 40 tahun juga. Muhasabah diri amat penting terutama dalam apa yang yang telah dilakukan dan apa yang ingin dilakukan. Solat istiharah penting dalam memohon Allah SAW supaya memberikan laluan dan mempermudahkan urusan ke arah kebaikan. Muhasabah juga terhadap apa yang berlaku pada diri kita dan pada orang lain sebagai ibrah atau iktibar kepada diri sendiri. Bagi yang telah menginjak kaki ke usia 40 tahun, perlu mengambil peluang untuk melakukan sebanyak mungkin sumbangan sebagai bekalan diri kita (Prof Ajmain menggunakan istilah mewariskan pengetahuan dan pengalaman sebagai sumbangan dan manfaat yang ditinggalkan kepada orang lain). Kita perlu perbaharui dan meningkatkan amalan kebaikan, dan mengurangkan (meninggalkan) amalan yang buruk (kena muhasabah diri tentang apakan tindakan kita yang mengarah ke arah amalan buruk)

3) Doa: Perbanyakkan doa Surah Al Ahqaf: ayat 15. Antara intipati doa tersebut ialah, kita perlu mensyukuri dengan apa yang kita ada. Contoh: Bagi yang belum mendapat kenaikan pangkat, jangan lihat apa yang Allah SAW tidak kurniakan kepada kita. Kita perlu bersyukur dengan apa yang kita ada. Allah SAW lebih mengetahui di atas kurniaan dan nikmat yang diberikan kepada kita. Mungkin dengan tiada kenaikan pangkat itu, Allah SAW ingin kita lebih dekat denganNya. Kita perlu memohon dari Allah SAW dengan nikmat sedia ada yang dikurniakan kepada kita akan lebih mendekatkan diri kepada Allah SAW, terutamanya nikmat yang paling besar ialah nikmat Iman. Nikmat sihat dan sebagainya adalah nikmat sampingan yang Allah SAW beri kepada kita dan juga orang lain (meskipun mereka belum lagi mendapat hidayah dari Allah SAW). Nikmat diberikan iman adalah suatu kurniaan yang paling istimewa. Kita juga perlu berdoa dan mengharapkan keturunan kita menjadi individu yang soleh (ada doa lain seperti doa dari surah Al-furqan: ayat 74 dan surah Ibrahim: ayat 35-37).

Niat

Sesi program kerohanian hari ini disampaikan oleh Dr Aminuddin Hehsan tentang hijrah. Kupasan hadis tentang niat ada maksud tersirat.

Dari Amirul Mu’minin, Abi Hafs Umar bin Al Khattab RA, dia berkata, “Saya mendengar Rasulullah SAW bersabda: Sesungguhnya setiap perbuatan bergantung pada niat. Dan sesungguhnya setiap orang (akan dibalas) berdasarkan apa yang dia niatkan. Siapa yang hijrahnya kerana (ingin mendapatkan keredhaan) Allah dan Rasul-Nya, maka hijrahnya kepada (keredhaan) Allah dan Rasul-Nya. Dan siapa yang hijrahnya karena menginginkan kehidupan yang layak di dunia atau kerana wanita yang ingin dinikahinya maka hijrahnya (akan bergantung sebagaimana) yang dia niatkan.“

Apa jua amalan dan perbuatan (besar atau kecil, penting atau kurang penting) yang tidak dimulakan dengan niat, tidak akan dikira sebagai ibadah dan tidak akan diberikan ganjaran meskipun ianya adalah perbuatan dan amalan yang baik. Dalam kehidupan harian kita, adakah kita sentiasa melakukan sesuatu dengan niat? Contoh: Buang air di tandas. Adakah kita detikkan niat dalam hati tujuan kita membuang air besar atau kecil untuk tujuan menjaga kesihatan? Selalunya perkara tersebut menjadi satu kebiasaan sehingga kita tidak terfikir pun akan niat melaksanakan perkara tersebut.

“Buang air besar atau kecil pun nak kena niat ke?” Berdasarkan kupasan hadis yang diterangkan oleh Dr Aminuddin, kesimpulannya sekiranya tiada niat, tiada ganjaran akan diberikan.

Hari ini, aku belajar satu perkara baru dari hadis yang aku telah pelajari sejak zaman sekolah menengah lagi. Sesungguhnya ilmu Allah itu sangat luas. Meskipun kita telah mempelajari sesuatu perkara, belum tentu kita telah memahaminya sepenuhnya.

Protected: A moment to be remembered with S, a unique soul

Hadis Rasullullah SAW tentang gila kuasa

Aku pernah ternampak satu hadis tentang tanda-tanda akhir zaman dan tentang zaman di mana ramai orang gila akan kuasa, pangkat dan status. Di era sekarang, agak senang mencari maklumat tetapi untuk mencari maklumat yang sahih perlu sedikit usaha untuk membuat analisa.

Alhamdulillah setelah beberapa hari, akhirnya dapat jumpa satu buku yang diterbitkan oleh seorang ahli akademik dari USIM bertajuk 40 hadis tentang politik dan kepimpinan.

Hadis pertama mengenai sifat manusia yang sememangnya suka akan pangkat, kuasa dan status. Boleh rujuk dari Sahih al-Bukhari, no: 7148.

Akan tetapi, Nabi Muhammad SAW ada berpesan supaya mengelakkan diri dari meminta untuk diberikan jawatan. Boleh rujuk dari Sahih al-Bukhari, no: 7146.

Dalam konteks sekarang, adakah menghantar permohonan untuk tujuan kenaikan pangkat atau mengisi borang untuk jawatan pentadbir dikira termasuk dalam larangan Nabi Muhammad SAW? Ini membuat aku berfikir panjang dan banyak kali untuk proses kenaikan pangkat. Ada yang mungkin berfikir, “Ala, apa yang nak disusahkan sangat? Tekan butang je dalam sistem. Apa yang diperlukan adalah berdasarkan penilaian tahunan dan bukti yang dimasukkan setiap tahun yang terkumpul seperti bilangan menjadi penyelidik utama, bilangan penerbitan dan sebagainya”

Pangkat berbeza dari jawatan? Dari satu sudut, ianya adalah berbeza tetapi dari satu sudut lain, ianya merujuk kepada tanggungjawab dan kebergantungjawapan seseorang berdasarkan pangkat, jawatan, status (boleh melabel apa jua istilah). Mungkinkah ini yang akan menjadi penyesalan di akhirat nanti seperti yang dinyatakan dalam hadis Nabi Muhammad SAW?

Mungkin ada yang berpendapat bahawa terdapat nabi yang meminta diberikan jawatan, seperti Nabi Yusuf AS. Persoalannya ialah, layakkah kita hendak membandingkan diri dengan seseorang yang Allah telah menaikkan taraf dirinya sebagai Nabi? Bahasa orang yang biasa didengari: “Kena sedar diri la kan, kita ni siapa“. Akan tetapi ada kelonggaran untuk memastikan kepentingan masyarakat terjaga dengan “mencalonkan” diri untuk jawatan tertentu dengan syarat tertentu yang perlu dipenuhi.

Dalam apa jua keadaan, sekiranya kita diberikan jawatan, perlu dilaksanakan tanggungjawab dengan baik, dan tidak menzalimi orang lain dengan tindakan dan juga keputusan yang diambil. Dalam bentuk tulisan dan percakapan, ianya sesuatu yang mudah untuk dilaksanakan tetapi dalam bentuk perbuatan, ianya bukan mudah. Semoga Allah permudahkan urusan orang yang diberi jawatan untuk melaksanakan tugasan dengan adil dan saksama.

COVID-19: Dear former student

An FB post that you posted on 21 September 2021 caught my attention. I could not stop thinking about your well-being. Being a mother of two young children is not easy while working at home to teach due to the pandemic. I know you are strong, but there are times when you might falter. It is just a phase. A tough phase to deal with by a tough lady like you. It is ok to be sad, frustrated and hopeless with certain things but do not let it drag too long.

Take one thing at a time. It is so common to hear people say that. But it is true. Sometimes, we need to break things down into manageable chunks that we can deal with. There is no need to rush on doing things.

I am so proud of you. With what you have done and accomplished so far, I believe and always pray that you will go far in your life as an educator. There were times when I was your teacher, but now, you teach me more than I can teach you. I learn from you and others so many new digital tools that I can use in my class. I learn from you and others to persevere despite the challenges that we might face in life. I know that you are a risk taker in changing hardship into success. Like Ralph Waldo Emerson said “To improve is to change, to be perfect is to change often“. Together in this journey as educators, you are not alone. We always have each other. We might have been through hell and back in life. But we have a choice not to remain there. If we choose to live in misery, we will be miserable in life. I know you will make a better choice than that. I pray may Allah ease the challenging process.

Sepandai-pandai tupai melompat, akhirnya ……

I purposely put the title in Malay using one of the famous idiom: “Sepandai-pandai tupai melompat akhirnya jatuh ke tanah juga”. No doubt academic status especially being a professor is a goal that some people set as academicians. There is nothing wrong in that but in the current practice of academia, sometimes to chase fame and glory, some people do not hesitate to cut corners and resort to unethical practice even. It is kind of shame such practice happens. One of the latest is by a renowned researcher (or known as one before he was caught), Dan Ariely. I first came across his name through TED Talk. Unlike some other well-known researchers in psychology like Phillip Zimbardo, Carol Dweck and such, he is not that famous when I was an undergraduate students.

Dan Ariely’s research was about honesty. It is really interesting to know what makes people to be honest or dishonest and can one’s honesty be “changed”? His research provides an insight about that but later on when other researchers tried to replicate his work, they found out otherwise. This is when some people start to dig deeper. Later on they found out that Dan Ariely concealed some data and thus, ironically when though his research is about being honest, yet he is dishonest about his own research. The evidence that researchers found about his work is compelling. Click HERE to know more.

So, I would rather be true and honest to myself and others than being famous or getting the highest position of academic accolade i.e. professorship. I create this post as a reminder that what is important that I should focus on and do not jump into the bandwagon of unscrupulous practice.

The launch of FSSHEART 20

The launch of FSSHEART 20 is launched today. HEART stands for “Happy, Empathy, Appreciate, Responsible, Trust”. Datuk Dr Nurhafizah Musa was invited as the speaker to share her wisdom and knowledge about Husnuzzon.

I don’t know her personally but I always feel that she is unique. I know that I could never be like her but I aim to at least try to imitate her attitudes and behavior (which is a struggle on my part). She is a role model. Indeed.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Qalbun Saleem encompasses attitudes and behaviors essential for relationships, leadership and such. What really important is what and to what extent we are going (willing) to take action to change for improving our attitudes and behaviors. That is the most challenging part. We might be complacent with the things that we are so used to do through certain ways. In this case, it requires and demands us to change the ways we are doing things. How willing we are to change the habits, culture and such?

We need to rely on the guidance from Allah. We need to seek for Allah’s guidance. But first, we need to know how to change as well and be clear about the definition and direction of our action.

For example, we need to know the definition of Husnuzzon (attitudes and how we look at something of other person in positive manner that satisfying/fulfilling or in Malay = sangka baik). It involves training to do reflection (muhasabah) and soul cleansing (tazkiyatul nafs). It involves cognitive and emotional aspects. If we think a negative event as a problem, we will be a problem maker/enhancer. If we think a negative event as a solution or we think a problem as an opportunity to invent something better, we will be a problem solver.

In short, if we think a problem as a problem, we will not be able to move forward to think about the possible solutions. If we think about a problem as an opportunity for us to solve a problem, we will be able to move forward solving a problem. It is how we look at a problem from different perspective matters.

Al-Hujurat (49): 12

O believers! Avoid many suspicions, ˹for˺ indeed, some suspicions are sinful. And do not spy, nor backbite one another. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of their dead brother? You would despise that!¹ And fear Allah. Surely Allah is ˹the˺ Accepter of Repentance, Most Merciful.

It is undeniable that we have negative thoughts about others. Sometimes we have this in our mind that come across once a while. But those negative thoughts would be dangerous once it is translated in our behavior (verbal or/and non-verbal). So, it is really important to identify the negative thoughts and try to eradicate it before it is translated into behavior. This is not easy. It is a constant battle. This is what I feel. So, that might explain why I have few friends because I am afraid that I might be influenced by them unconsciously. The more the merrier? Not in my case.

How can negative thoughts become sin? As long as it remains in our mind, it is not sinful. But once it is translated into verbal or action, for example, we tell our thoughts about someone (negative) to another person, our initial negative thoughts are translated into verbal action, thus it becomes sinful. We are accountable towards it.

But, another important thing that we have to remind ourselves is to have husnuzzon towards Allah. Sometimes we overlook the fact that we are at present situation because of Him. It is not due to other person’s decision. For example, if we perceive getting a promotion is by designed, it is as if we are in full control of what we can achieve and gain based on our efforts whereas it is the fact that each of us have different capacity and capability given by Allah to perform, achieve and gain whatever things exist in this world either professional status and such.

Of course we should do our best, give the best effort and such. But the One who gives the best solution, guidance and all is Allah. So, it is our responsibility to choose to remain negative or positive. I know it is difficult. This is my personal battle.

Some of the tips that I get from this session is

Change our attitudes. Remind ourselves that person might be better than you in things that Allah Knows better. “Force” ourselves to change our negative thoughts into positive thoughts.
Inculcate the culture of Husnuzzon

There are five levels of the culture of Husnuzzon:

Taáruf level
Tafahum level
Takaful level
Tanasuh level
Taroodhi level

First: Taáruf level

Knowing me, knowing you
Getting to know each other is important at personal level.

Second: Tafahum level

Emphatize – putting ourselves in the other’s situation.
Imagine if we are in the other person’s situation, we need to give ourselves opportunity to understand other person

Third: Takaful level

Supporting each other.
Each of us have our own strengths and difficulties.
Acknowledge and appreciate other contribution

Fourth: Tanasuh level

Reminding each other, such as giving advice and such.
Learn to appreciate people’s advice.

Fifth: Taroodhi level

Open-minded towards what we have and others have (not being envious)
Be happy for what others have in terms of position and such without feeling envious

Level of relationship

First level: Husnuzzon

Second level: Emphatic and love for good things for others

Third level: Ithar (put other’s needs first above our own needs)

Question ask by an audience (to appreciate the ones who asked the question, I put the original question without translating)

Question: Sekiranya ada hamba Allah menceritakan sesuatu yg tidak benar tentang kita, perlu ke kita bersemuka dan membetulkan keadaan atau perlu ke kita redha dan membiarkan sahaja?

Answer: We need to think about the benefits and negative consequences if we confront the person saying bad things about us. But if it is about our right, we can confront the perpetrator to rectify the matter. We have to do it with hikmah (Note: This is not easy to be done by me).

What is my first impression of …..

I was called to meet the Chair few days ago. At first, I was thinking, what should I do to prepare myself to see her? Well, there is nothing better to do than the usual stuff that I do when I have something big up coming. Is meeting the Chair fall under such category? I know that it is not a usual occasion for her to call us one by one. So, it could be a big thing.

I have asked around some seniors and they told me about their meeting. So, I know what to expect. I hope that mine goes well. That’s it.

Did it go well? One thing that I could say is the meeting is a memorable one. I use “Is” rather than “was” because it does leave indelible mark in my heart.

Knowing that the whole world will read this (do I care?), I just want to say that “It is not easy to fulfil the expectations that are set forth by others”. Yup. As an academician, I know and am fully aware of the things that I have to do but at the same time, I know very well that in the end of the day, what matters most is “Will it matter in the eyes of Allah?” That’s the question that I would always ask myself.

Will it matter to get promoted? Whoah! Ok. I am not going to delve into this any further.

Let’s take a step back about this matter. I always ask myself about this “In what way that my existence could help others to be a better person?” So, I might appear as a strict supervisor to my research students because if I could not help them to be a better person, what’s the point of being their supervisor? Of course, in doing so, I will prompt them to give their best. Clearly, some people who are paper chasing type would have different idea about working hard or working their ass off.

So, does it enhance my importance by getting promoted? Clearly, it does not matter. I learn from great people with the title Professor who are thinkers. Do I find such among my current colleagues?

Oh, do I have time to look at them closely to make such evaluation? Better keep myself busy doing other things like making videos for my class than evaluating them. Just say that I have my own standard that I use to evaluate myself. It does not rely on whatever and whoever KPI. Capisce?

I like the picture in your webometrics

One of the juniors asked me where do I get the picture from for this blog. Well, it is a picture that I took long time ago when I was in Durham. It was autumn. Durham has a picturesque landscape. Every nook and corner is breathtaking. I am glad that I decided to do my PhD there even though I vividly remember some of my friends mocked my decision of going there because Durham is less unknown as Cambridge or Oxford. Yeah right. That is a common assumption by some Malaysians about Durham.