When it comes to personality traits, most of the time, we are looking at how different individuals from others. But the differences are somewhat related to situation that individuals are dealing with. In this case, our traits are transcended from being characteristics that describe us as a person to how we react to certain situations based on what we have learned through cultural norms that are imposed on us or how we impose those cultural experiences on ourselves. Thus, there would be traits that seem to be out of place, as if we are out of character. But we have to look closely that we need to have a space or place to be ourselves. This is a time for us to recharge. This is what Brian Little said.
Category: Personal
The art of story telling
I attended a workshop on using storytelling as a method in teaching and learning practice. The facilitators are PM Hayati and Ir Razali. I am not a good storyteller but I try to improve the art through crafting cases i.e. stories for my class discussion activities and assignments. Here is one of the notes that I got from the workshop,
How to overcome impostor syndrome?
These are ten strategies that I excerpt from Impostor Syndrome website.
- Break the silence. Shame keeps a lot of people from “fessing up” about their fraudulent feelings. Knowing there’s a name for these feelings and that you are not alone can be tremendously freeing.
- Separate feelings from fact. There are times you’ll feel stupid. It happens to everyone from time to time. Realize that just because you may feel stupid, doesn’t mean you are.
- Recognize when you should feel fraudulent. If you’re one of the first or the few women or a minority in your field or work place, it’s only natural you’d sometimes feel like you don’t totally fit in. Instead of taking your self-doubt as a sign of your ineptness, recognize that it might be a normal response to being an outsider.
- Accentuate the positive. Perfectionism can indicate a healthy drive to excel. The trick is to not obsess over everything being just so. Do a great job when it matters most, without persevering over routine tasks. Forgive yourself when the inevitable mistake happens.
- Develop a new response to failure and mistake making. Henry Ford once said, “Failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently.” Instead of beating yourself up for being human and blowing the big project, do what professional athletes do and glean the learning value from the mistake and move on.
- Right the rules. If you’ve been operating under misguided rules like, “I should always know the answer,” or “Never ask for help” start asserting your rights. Recognize that you have just as much right as the next person to be wrong, have an off-day, or ask for assistance.
- Develop a new script. Your script is that automatic mental tapes that starts playing in situations that trigger your Impostor feelings. When you start a new job or project instead of thinking for example, “Wait till they find out I have no idea what I’m doing,” try thinking, “Everyone who starts something new feels off-base in the beginning. I may not know all the answers but I’m smart enough to find them out.”
- Visualize success. Do what professional athletes do. Spend time beforehand picturing yourself making a successful presentation or calmly posing your question in class. It sure beats picturing impending disaster and will help with performance-related stress.
- Reward yourself. Break the cycle of continually seeking °© and then dismissing °© validation outside of yourself by learning to pat yourself on the back.
- Fake it ‘til you make it. Now and then we all have to fly by the seat of our pants. Instead of considering “winging it” as proof of your ineptness, learn to do what many high achievers do and view it as a skill. The point of the worn out phrase, fake it til you make it, still stands: Don’t wait until you feel confident to start putting yourself out there. Courage comes from taking risks. Change your behavior first and allow your confidence to build.
Impostor syndrome
What is impostor syndrome? It is said that even Albert Einstein experienced this before regardless of his astounding achievement. But, you don’t have to be Einstein to experience impostor syndrome. It exists in any high achievers who have self-doubt about themselves.
Picture is taken from The Networking Nerd
Many studies have been conducted on this since psychologists explored this phenomenon back in the 1970s even. Many articles have been written to give some tips that people can use to overcome this phenomenon such as what is proposed by Valerie Ashby (who is highly accomplished academician). There are also some articles written by graduate students to document their journey of experiencing impostor syndrome as post graduate students such as by Adam Persky.
Why do I care to search information about this? After I finished my Latihan Ikhtisas, some seniors told me that I should gear up my efforts to climb the social ladder of the academia. Rather than being a “normal” senior lecturer, it is impertinent for me to prove that I deserve to be promoted to Associate Professor. The thing is, I have this idea of what constitute an Associate Professor and a Professor. I don’t think I have what it takes to become one now. But I know some might think otherwise because they are not experiencing impostor syndrome. They are Jack of all trade, master of none. I want to enhance my skills. This would take me years to do so. I know some use political measure to climb the academia social hierarchy, but I am not them. I know where I stand. Being true to myself is not easy. I know. But, like Dr Seuss said
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind do not matter and those who matter do not mind”
Note: I know that I like to use Dr Seuss’s quotes. Sound childish, right? Well, everybody has his own opinion. I respect that.
I am such a softie
I was spring cleaning my office (no picture to show because it is so messy), I found some of my old masters assignments (sigh.. what was I thinking hoarding these things. I know right, I should get rid of it).
Then, to take a break, I checked my FB because I am learning to use Jamboard from one of my friends so, I need to review her class activity using Jamboard and like always, I was diverted to other things and I ended up “exploring” this webpage. One of the post is about late Mimi. I have known her since my undergraduate years. A friendly senior. She was so humble and care-free even though she spoke fluent English with a tinge of American accent. I felt envious. But she never was a snob even though she was one of the best students in our psychology department.
Fast forward, she messaged me not long after I finished my PhD. She was finishing her PhD in Clinical Psychology. Then after that, we kept in touch using FB messages and she invited me to hang out with her when I came to KL for work or leisure purposes. I never had the chance to honour her invitation. Not even once. Then, in 2017, I heard the news of her passing. I felt numb for days thinking how fragile is our life that we take for granted. Mimi, reading posts written by others about you in the Psychology@IIUM blog comforts me. Al-fatihah to you. May Allah Grant you eternal bliss.
Prawn-anchovy fritter [Cucur udang ikan bilis]
When I was in Durham, this was our weekend breakfast dish that I would prepare. Just the smell of it would wake my housemates up. I still remember Zeah and Nurul would said to each other (they were sharing room) “Si Dijah sudah masak cucur dia atu ni. Bah kita bangun sekarang. Nanti kehabisan” [Dijah is cooking her cucur right now. Let’s wake up now. Don’t wait until it finishes]
I would prepare a jug of plain tea to go with the cucur. I vividly remember they would sit on the sofa while munching my cucur. How time flies! It has been a while since I prepare this myself. Food does bring people closer to one another. Indeed.
A bitter sweet moment
It is always a bitter sweet moment for me every time I got Dunelm Magazine. Why? The salutation that they use i.e. “Dr Jaffri”. It would always remind me of my late dad, my family sacrifices, my mom’s illness during my absent and my own struggle that I had to face when I was in Durham. Getting this magazine would always bring tears to my eyes. But, enough of crying for me now. I got new idea to adapt one of the articles for my MUET reading comprehension questions that I can use for the Academic Camp.
UTM webometrics assessment [Penilaian Webometrik UTM]
I am “super” slow when it comes to using this webpage. I am only recently learning about how they calculate marks for webometrik for ELPPT. I know some of you are rolling your eyes. You can roll your eyes as you wish. But I am learning. I learn from others slowly. I need time to digest this new thing (new for me, not for others). One of the things that I pick up from others’ webpage and Nihra’s note is about how to know your webpage presence rating.
There are the steps as follow:
- Open www.google.com as usual
- At google search column (the middle one), type “https://people.utm.my/hadijahjafrri” (site:your webpage url)
- Then, google will give your webpage search result.
Note: My webpage present rating is not much as compared to those who have won Citra Karisma award for Webometric. But, like Dr Seuss once said “It’s not about what it is, it’s about what it can become.”
As I have admitted, I am a slow academician who strongly believe in the slow professor principles and I am “in” with the slow professor movement.
“Slow professors “advocate deliberation over acceleration” because they “need time to think, and so do our students. Time for reflection and open-ended inquiry is not a luxury but is crucial to what we do.” [excerpt from Slow Professor: Challenging the Culture of Speed in the Academy (University of Toronto Press).
Puppy love? Monkey love?
I had a quick chat with Ita yesterday. I asked her about what’s new and what’s not about school. She told me about some teenage angst among the form 5 students. Yup. Among the students who she mentioned was in my class. When they caught the form four student last April due to “energy booster” stuff, I wrote to all my former form 4 students a letter.
I am a bit busy off lately. I don’t think I would have enough time to write each and every one of them a letter. But I will meet some of them this Friday for our tuition class in sha Allah. So, I would have a pep talk with them. There are various issues that teachers are worried about. Among the issues are coupling, same gender close relationship, a minor brawl (this one is due to minor misunderstanding between a senior and a junior relating to defending one’s girlfriend) and lack of motivation in their study. Some of the issues are part and parcel of life. As teenagers, they are exploring their identity and thus they need to learn to negotiate with others. It is not easy to do that. They need guidance and lots of patience from other adults.
But the thing is, when it comes to opposite gender relationship, for some teachers, it is too early for them to explore in that area. For me, it is ok as long as they know the boundary that they have to abide according to Islam. A normal note from one to another is common. To meet or hang out at the mall is normal (of course this is not right if you don’t observe “the” guideline). Some of them might say that their parents met when they were at school. They were high school sweet hearts. So sweet right? Yeah right. Now, their children are following their parents footsteps. Of course, this makes thing a bit challenging for the teachers because on one hand. the parents are ok with that and on the other hand, the teachers don’t want it to become a culture at school.
Some people can balance their act when it comes to studying and coupling. But if you have string of Cs and Ds, it clearly indicates that you need to focus on one aspect more than trying to focus on both. But again, it is choice. At the end of the day, the students need to decide and be accountable towards their decision.
My quizziz collection: Suitable for secondary school students
I have been using Quizziz since 2016. But when I went for my Latihan Ikhtisas, I still continued using Quizziz for my form 1 and form 4 students. Here are some of the Quizziz that I made that anyone can get access to any time, any where provided they have internet connection [Note: I make it public so that there is no password or code needed to get access to it]
Form 4
Charge of the Light Brigade (Poem)
Form 1
Grammar
Past Progressive/Continuous Tense
