Murray Oxman listed 50 uncommon tips on how to read people
and here are a few tips I would like to share.
- Trading – people can very manipulative, and trading is a big part of it,…- they expect something in return for their support. Never trade with people. Stand on your own feet. Once people catch on you can’t be bought they’ll shot their true colors.
- Approval – There are people who beg for approval. … Why do they seek your approval? They dont want to be self-responsible or self-reliant.
- Flattery – When someone starts feeding your ego, ask yourself, “just what is he after – do I want to go along with this?”
- People want you to go as fast as they are. Maybe they want you to make a snap decision on an important matter – right now. Don’t get caught up in their momentum. Deliberately slow down! You dictate the tempo that things will move. Always and in everything, be your own person.
- Please yourself – trying to please others will get you nothing but anxiety, nervousness and scorn. Please your True Self and you receive the inner-riches of a nice, relaxed, confident life.
- Feeling sad – cheerfulness is a healthy alternative
- Friends – A real friend will always tell you what you need to hear – the truth – not what you prefer to hear….Truth is really the only friend a person can have and needs. Friends in Truth are real friends.
- Comfort – Don’t push people psychologically. They’ll resist and push back. Use tact, slow down, take your time and introduce new ideas to them gradually, so they’ll feel at ease with you.
- Priorities – You can tell a lot about people by observing what their priorities are. Not what theybsay they are, but what you observe them actually be.
- Answers – when you ask some people questions, you rarely get a straight answer. … when you get vague, rambling answers ask, “Exactly, what does that mean?”
- Accountability – People who hold themselves accountable are to be admired. They make for good company…
- Pain – “What a day, the stress was terrible, now I can relax a little.” Don’t buy it! It’s all a self-centred act to feel important and get a false sense of accomplishment.
- Self-centred people love to get attention any way they can. One trick they use is to mentally make themselves physically ill – psychosomatic sickness. Be strong. Don’t buy into the act. It hurts all concerned.
- Attachments – “Love the Creator not the creations”. That’s sage advice.
- Excuses – Never buy into people’s excuses for their actions. There’s only one reason people do what they do – they want to!
Murray Oxman. 2006. How to Read People Like a Book. Petaling Jaya: Advantage Quest.